And yes, it’s important that their dad is a feminist, because now that’s what they expect of all men. It is absolutely men’s responsibility to fight sexism too. And as spouses and partners and boyfriends, we need to work hard and be deliberate about creating truly equal relationships.
kde: stanica Záriečie
kedy: štvrtok 15. 1. 2015, 18.00
o čom: Čo je to vlastne feminizmus? Je to boj alebo zmierenie? Týka sa len žien alebo aj mužov?
s kým: Do diskusie Agora si tentoraz Peter Cibulka pozval Janu Cvikovú – zakladateľku feministického kultúrneho časopisu Aspekt, Darinu Arce z Inštitútu rodovej rovnosti a výtvarníčku a filmovú teoretičku Evu Filovú.
Približne od 42. minúty v tej prvej časti Jana Cviková rozpráva o našej práci, ktorú robíme v Ženských Kruhoch.
(Inak ale myslim, že celej debate by prospelo, keby rozprávali viac konkrétností a príkladov, lebo to bolo hodne filozofické a bol tam priestor a dobré otázky, ktorý sa mi zdá, že nevyužili dostatočne, aby to viac sprístupnili ľuďom, čo sa takýmito otázkami nezaoberajú.)
aspektslovenskej literárnej verejnosti prinavrátil jej „stratené“ emigrované spisovateľky, objavil pre ňu nové postavy a ich autorky. Vydáva nielen kanonizované texty nositeliek Nobelovej ceny, ale aj provokujúce prózy žien, ktoré máju nálepky radšej na chladničke, než na obálkach kníh.
2x o mamách:
keď som tadiaľ išla predvčerom, tak toto sa tam nedialo:
Having chosen the child-free life, I didn’t expect that caring for loved ones would play any significant role in my career path. But I didn’t factor in my mom and dad. Like many in my generation, I never fully considered the potential need to care for my aging parents.
Foregoing children was a complicated, difficult decision for me. It was riddled with fears about my parenting abilities, an irrational terror of labor pains, and the reality that I simply never felt ready. But once the decision was behind me, I enjoyed my marriage and career largely unfettered, supportive of my colleagues with kids, yet never imagining that I’d experience anything like the comings and goings of maternity leave that presented them with so many challenges. That is, until my parents began to age.
Mostly, I see now, she told the story as a metaphor for the eternal Mantra of All Mothers, a mantra that only now, as a mother am I initiated into, a mantra which is: I tried my best. It wasn’t enough. But it could have been worse.
40 starých fotiek – na tejto je dieťa, ktoré “venčia” v klietke na paneláku, aby malo dosť slniečka a čerstvého vzduchu (okolo roku 1937)
Stephen Hawking zorganizoval party pre cestovateľov v čase. A dal o nej vedieť až potom, ako skončila:
Rodičia starajúci sa o deti na jednotke intenzívnej starostlivosti (Toronto) – kiežby sa to rozmohlo! (Len na porovnanie – jedna sestrička počas Kubkovo pobytu na Kramároch pred dvoma týždňami spomínala, že pre nedostatok miesta na oddelení (nie JIS) uvažujú, že by okrem kojacich matiek nepovoľovali pobyt rodičov. Teraz tam rodičia deti kŕmia, kúpu, uspávajú, hrajú sa s nimi, ukľudňujú ich… potom ich tam budú mať dvakrát viac a toto všetko bude robiť kto?)
Parents have long been encouraged to spend time with their babies in the NICU, but they were typically more observers than participants, often feeling helpless and lost as they sat by their child’s isolette watching every breath, trying to make sense of the monitors and startling at every bell or buzzer around them.
“With family integrated care, we have done something quite different,” explains Dr. Shoo Lee, pediatrician-in-chief and director of the Maternal-Infant Care Research Centre.
“What we’ve done is to say that for all babies in the NICU, the parents should be the primary caregivers, not the nurses. And the nurses are really teachers to the parents.”
The program was instituted following a 2011-2012 pilot project in which the parents of 40 newborns were asked to spend a minimum of eight hours a day in the NICU and tasked with the overall management of their child’s care.
That included bathing and changing diapers, monitoring the infant’s vital signs, and recording feedings and weight gain on their medical chart. Nurses were responsible for the medical side of care — looking after feeding tubes, adjusting ventilation apparatus and administering medications.
The babies’ progress was compared with those whose care was primarily provided by nurses, and Lee says “the results were phenomenal.”
“There was a 25 per cent improvement in weight gain of the babies who were looked after by the parents,” he says. “Breastfeeding rates doubled from 40-something per cent to over 80 per cent. Infection rates fell from 11 per cent in the nurse group to zero in the parent group. Treatment errors dropped by 25 per cent. Parental satisfaction went up, parental stress went down.
When the judge asked me ‘What is the reason for this name change?’ I said ‘….Feminism?’ She smiled and said ‘So noted.’ When the judge asked Dave ‘What is the reason for this name change?’ he said ‘Because I love my wife.’
Ak je to príliš rýchle, tu sú slová (zvýraznenie moje):
I thought it was ok
I could understand their reasons
They said ‘There might be a man or a nervous child seeing’
this small piece of flesh that they weren’t quite expecting
so I whispered and tiptoed with nervous discretion.
But after six months of her life sat sitting on lids
Sipping on her milk nostrils sniffing up piss
Trying not to bang her head on toilet roll dispensers
I wonder whether these public loo feeds offend her?
Cos I’m getting tired of discretion and being ‘polite’ as my baby’s first sips are drowned drenched in shite,
I spent the first feeding months of her beautiful life
Feeling nervous and awkward and wanting everything right.
Surrounded by family until I stepped out the house
It took me eight weeks to get the confidence to go into town
Now the comments around me cut like a knife
As I rush into toilet cubicles feeling nothing like nice.
Because I’m giving her milk that’s not in a bottle
Wishing the cocaine generation white powder would topple
I see pyramid sales pitches across our green globe
and female breasts banned. Unless they’re out just for show.
And the more I go out, the more I can’t stand it,
I walk into town feel I’m surrounded by bandits
Cos in this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
and family newsagents’ magazines full of it
Whsmith top shelves out for men – Why don’t you complain about them then? In this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’ and family newsagents magazines full of it Whsmith top shelves out for men, I’m getting embarrassed In case a small flash of flesh might offend. And I’m mot trying to ‘parade’ this, I don’t want to make a show But when I’m told I’d be better just staying at home And when another friend I know is thrown off a bus And another woman told to get out the pub Even my grandma said maybe I was ‘sexing it up’. And I’m sure the milk makers love all this fuss All the cussing and worry and looks of disgust As another mother turns from nipples to powder Ashamed or embarrassed by comments around her and
As I hold her head up and pull my cardy across and she sips on the liquor made by everyones God, I think
For God sake, Jesus drank it
So did Sidhartha, Muhammed and Moses and both of their fathers
Ganesh and Shiva and Brighid and Buddha and I’m sure they weren’t doing it sniffing up piss as their mothers sat embarassed on cold toilet lids
In a country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
In a country of low cut tops cleavage and skin
In a country of cloth bags and recycling bins and as I desperately try to take all of it in,
I hold her head up
I can’t get my head round
The anger towards us and not to the sounds
of lorries offloading formula milk
into countries where water runs dripping in filth
In towns where breasts are oasis of life
now dried up in two for one offers, enticed by labels and logos and gold standard rights
claiming ‘breastmilk is healthier powdered and white’
packaged and branded and sold at a price so that nothing is free in this money fuelled life.
Which is fine
If you need it or prefer and can afford to use bottles, where water is clean and bacteria boiled,
but in towns where they drown in pollution and sewage
bottled kids die and they knew that they’d do it
In families where pennies are savoured like sweets
We’re now paying for one thing that’s always been free
In villages empty of hospital beds
babies die, diarrhoea fuelled that breastmilk would end
So no more will I sit on these cold toilet lids
No matter how embarrassed I feel as she sips
Cos in this country of billboards covered in ‘tits’
I think I should try to get used to this.
Accordingly, I have taken to buying all of Madeline’s shirts in the boys section, the result of (her boy-ish haircut and) which is that half the time people refer to her as “he”. This doesn’t terribly bother me, especially if she ends up getting the gender wage premium that people are always yammering about on Facebook, but it makes me wonder why such a stark divide between toddler boy shirts and toddler girl shirts. And, of course, it makes me wonder if the divide is so stark that I can build a model to predict it!
The […] table shows, for each of the 10 principal components, the eigenshirt, the shirt with the largest component value, the shirt with the closest-to-zero value, the shirt with the largest negative component value, and the “anti-eigenshirt”.
For 75 years, Finland’s expectant mothers have been given a box by the state. It’s like a starter kit of clothes, sheets and toys that can even be used as a bed. And some say it helped Finland achieve one of the world’s lowest infant mortality rates.
Thus Mazur begins a class with a student-sourced question, then asks students to think the problem through and commit to an answer, which each records using a handheld device (smartphones work fine), and which a central computer statistically compiles, without displaying the overall tally. If between 30 and 70 percent of the class gets the correct answer (Mazur seeks controversy), he moves on to peer instruction. Students find a neighbor with a different answer and make a case for their own response. Each tries to convince the other… After two or three minutes, the students vote again, and typically the percentage of correct answers dramatically improves. Then the cycle repeats.
“If you were me and you had two dads that loved each other and kids at school teased you about it, what would you do?” And guess what! Obama wrote Sophia back. His advice: “A good rule is to treat others the way you hope they will treat you. Remind your friends at school about this rule if they say something that hurts your feelings.”
But in this election, it became abundantly clear that women’s issues are not fringe issues, and women are not a special interest group. Instead it was women who cast the bulk of the votes this election – 53%, and women who proved the deciding factor, breaking in Barack Obama’s favour by 11 percentage points.
But we really need to make an effort to get in the picture. Our sons need to see how young and beautiful and human their mamas were. Our daughters need to see us vulnerable and open and just being ourselves — women, mamas, people living lives. Avoiding the camera because we don’t like to see our own pictures? How can that be okay?
Jednu zimu sme tak platonicky rozmýšľali nad výletom do Fairbanks (na Aljaške). Nakoniec sme nešli (príliš drahé letenky), ale stále platí, že by som sa tam niekedy chcela ísť pozrieť. (Problém bude v rozhodovaní, či v zime – kvôli polárnej žiare – alebo v lete – aby sme mohli aj trochu turistikovať po národných parkoch.) Zatiaľ iba zaujímavé čítanie o tom, aké je to tam s malými deťmi.
childrearing vs parenting – tento článok by som sem najradšej vložila celý (nie je ani dlhý), ale predsalen iba kúsok vystrihnem a pošlem vás ísť si prečítať zvyšok tam
Childrearing can be tedious, or easy, or challenging — usually each or all in turns. But the kicker is, the key and secret that those who denigrate childrearing never acknowledge, is that what children most need, more than organized playrooms or clean tables or even getting to schools, is to have adults who love them so deeply and broadly and fiercely that we’ll do the reflexive work of parenting. They need us not merely to be centered, but to center ourselves: they need to see how we wobble and return and be broken and yet thrive and be triggered and move on. They need us, us, whole and human and damaged and glorious, they need us bodies and breasts and arms and laps and minds and souls and they will eat us down and leave us drained and that is what they are supposed to do. It is what we did, what I did, what you did, and we can see this as a horror, or we can see it as a gift, or we can see it, we can know it, as life. Life. Just life.